"We're not buying chutney..."

I suppose it must be about time to panic now. Everyone else is. We're just about to shoot off to Spain for a few days, then we're back for a few days, then we'll be on a few planes for a few days and then we'll be in New Zealand. On paper, we're ready, which is to say everything's booked, we have (or can be fairly confident of soon having) all the certificates, med checks, shipping, insurance, flight, immigration, hotel and hire car documentation in order. Writing this instead of doing something more constructive is typical of me in these circumstances, ie in times of high stress, I invariably find something utterly frivolous to do. I've been pointlessly surfing things to do on a stopover in Los Angeles, for example (even though we're going via Singapore) seeing as the area's been in the news so much. An opportune time to visit, I'd say, spend some pocket money, maybe buy a couple of investment banks ;)

Mostly though, I've found it expedient to swot up on stuff worth checking out in NZ. A number of other visitors there seem to use the same stress-aversion technique I do, either that or they're incurable nerds. It's a very outdoorsy place and there's plenty of sport goes on beyond the obvious rugby-and-cricket. This is after all the home of falling off bridges for fun, having the world's first permanent bungee jumping site, and continues to innovate in the more bizarre thrill-seeking sports, including ball games. Cycling is very popular and seemingly infected with the "extreme sport" ethos; where I'd maybe have expected to see a decent turnout for a nice organised ride round a lake, they have 5,000 riders registered for a 160km mountainous course, with some of them putting their names down for the four-lap 640km "maxi-enduro"... there'll probably be someone doing it in a large inflatable ball, just to go one better.

Otherwise, the drawbacks are still sinking in. I mentioned the Ikea thing a few posts ago, and it seems we may have to re-think our TV strategy as well as home decor choices, as it turns out the BBC iPlayer feeds aren't (legally) available there. Nor are NZ offerings likely to provide much incentive to buy a TV, having as it does the worst TV programmes ever. Oz TV wasn't that much better when we were there, although ABC1's Gruen Transfer show recently came up with some pretty interesting ideas for alternative forms of entertainment for both countries. The spot was based on the news that NZ basically has no fully-funtional armed forces. I'm not sure if that's good news or bad, frankly. It should probably be filed under "drawbacks: inconsequential".

Of course we're almost deliriously excited about living there & Nik in particular is prone to sudden explosive bouts of uncontrollable frenzy at the thought. But we're already missing some things, mostly food-related, due to the double whammy of running down the pantry and the absolute ban on bringing food through NZ customs. They have highly-trained dogs at the airport, sniffing out not drugs or guns, but ham sandwiches. There's no shortage of poorly-trained dogs that could do the same job, but you have to admire their zeal. We certainly won't be risking it, even though the temptation to bring a year's supply of chorizo picante over from Spain is nigh-on overwhelming. There is hope for all things South East Asian of course and I don't mind leaving behind all my spices and stuff, but it really is almost impossible to force down a ploughman's without some Branston or something to help it on its way. Low-turnover condiments that won't get used up have been stricken from the shopping list until we get there. On the bright side, chutney looks big in NZ, so there's that at least to look forward to, and there's bound to be something resembling a cheese and pickle sarnie at the airport to ease the craving.

Right, I really must get on with the panicking... er, packing... next blog from Spain!